The word “periods” is associated with a lot of negativity, stigma, and stress. When puberty strikes, the first thing most of the girls hear is, “oh how is she going to manage her periods at this young age…”, “it is going to be tough…”, “it will be very painful…, “it will hinder her activity…” etc, etc. In certain orthodox households, she is indirectly told that her total freedom is lost and kept away from many important things during her periods. She is also told many stories and asked to follow various tedious rituals. All these are important events and observing the behavior of other women in their relative circle molds a girl’s attitude towards periods.
Eventually, every month menstruating days become a nightmare for young girls and women for numerous reasons. The physical distress associated with periods like stomach cramps, back pain, body pain, headache, stomach problems makes it even more dreadful. Also, other societal restrictions make women dread periods. It is not uncommon for girls and women to experience Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS) with symptoms in varying degrees like tension, mood swings, irritability, depressed mood, crying spells, insomnia, etc. All these have their own consequences in her everyday functioning.
There are mothers who feel guilty after hitting/shouting at their children due to PMS stress. Moreover, there are even working women who absent themselves during these days, and those who do not use public toilets and avoid many important events in their lives. Also, women tend to end up having more conflicts with their family members during this time. Yes, menstruation is associated with all these stressful aspects, but the truth is most of it is due to the negative attitude, which in turn aggravates the stress levels in menstruating women.
When you take an objective perspective about periods, one would appreciate and acknowledge the fact that it is healthy to get periods. Let’s know simple facts about periods. A period happens because of changes in hormones (estrogen and progesterone) in the body. These hormones cause the lining of the uterus (or womb) to build up. The built-up lining is ready for a fertilized egg to attach to the uterus and start developing. If there is no fertilized egg, the lining breaks down and bleeds. Then the same process happens all over again. Hence, the blood is nothing but a cushion for your child to grow, so there is nothing to feel awkward about it.
In fact, this whole process is phenomenal, and women actually should feel proud that they can give birth to a child after carrying it safely in their womb for 10 months. A regular menstrual period can tell you that your hormones are in balance, creates emotional wellness, signals that you are healthy and fertile, increases energy for exercise, makes you age slower, etc. On the other side, there are older women who envy girls and young women who are menstruating, as their lack of estrogen has its own side effects.
As the proverb goes, “grass is always greener on the other side”, girls will realize the significance of periods only after they attain menopause. Why wait until that, you can change your attitude NOW!! The benefits of developing a positive attitude towards periods are many, as you may not perceive more pain, and can remain stress-free during those 3-5 days and nobody can steal any days in your life, as you tend to live all 365 days in a year positively!
Imagine, the pain a woman endures during childbirth, be it a C-section or Normal delivery, it is enormous. But she can handle it positively because she is blessed with the precious gift of her life, a child. This can prove the fact that pain is also a perception. Similarly, if you start to appreciate that your body is getting healthy by maintaining hormone levels every month, all women can manage periods pain also.
And this acceptance that every month, I am going to get periods (and cannot change the law of nature) and I am going to endure it with grace and remain strong and decide not to shrink within self or feel inferior due to societal stigma, will itself attract you to following healthy practices to reduce the pain during periods. There are lots of women who do Yoga and other exercises during periods also, and it is completely normal. Take inspiration from those women in your lives and stay away from women who complain a lot and talk negatively about periods and try to break all the myths related to periods once for all!!
To start developing a positive attitude, women must first stop talking negatively about menstruating and the experiences related to that, with people from their own circle. Also, she must be aware of all negative beliefs attached to periods experience and challenge it with positive thoughts. And most importantly, avoid the feeling that you must be sympathized with by family members, especially spouse/parents during period days. Because this expectation of empathy/sympathy has developed in women due to the attitude that “females suffer because of periods”, which is not true.
Moreover, this expectation will intensify your pain experience as you unconsciously tend to attract others’ attention towards you. If you build this kind of attitude, then period days will be like any other days! You will not know even when your period is due and can involve in all normal activities and forget not to take care of yourself.
As after all, women are always precious and must celebrate womanhood. The change in attitude will allow a woman to relax and gain more confidence and relieve unnecessary stress. As a starting point, all women can make a list of better things that can happen to them during periods. One point to start is that period is a time to excuse yourself from hard work and involve in self-care! This activity will bring about a paradigm shift in your attitude and help you to savor life.
Note: The article does not talk about women suffering extreme pain related to issues like PCOS, Endometriosis, fibroids, or polyps, etc., which must get treated. If you experience more pain in absence of any physical complaints, then this article can help you. Also, this article does not undermine the pain experienced by any woman, but only tries to help them change the perception towards it, for a healthy life.
Author
Dr. Chitra Arvind
Dr Chitra is RCI certified Consultant Psychologist with around 20 years of experience in the field. She is the founder of the institution Manas, she undertakes training, counseling, psychological assessment, conducts workshops, does coaching, research, survey feedback, tool development, etc. These services are done for schools, colleges, corporate and CSR activities, social bodies, etc.
